The truth is, all of us want to be king. We all dream about money and success and power and prestige. We all dream of getting to that place where we will be served. But the truth is … a good king isn’t about being served. He’s all about serving others…
The goal of this journey of manhood is when we come to this stage, the King. It is a time of ruling and authority that starts in our 40’s and 50’s. It is when God begins to entrust a man with a sense of influence and power. It can come through wealth, a certain job, command of a unit, Senior Pastor — where we obtain a position of influence. You’ve come the point where you have a place to rule where you can bless others.
You’re meant to rule – designed for that role in its proper time. David knew God had made him King for the sake of his people. It is a time of great testing i.e. “What is it like for those under his care?”
The danger arises when he gets some success and then makes it all about him. We’ve all been under bad kings – men who made it all about them and it sucked the life out of the people reporting to him.
The question is when can you entrust a man with power and the answer is – only when he’s gone through his initiation. Without a proper initiation and time in the saddle, a man isn’t prepared for the burden of leadership. If he was never a cowboy then when he gets success and money, he’ll spend it on a never ending series of adventures or toys. If he was never the warrior, as a king he’ll start fights that aren’t needed to prove himself or he will lead his people into passivity. If he was never a lover, then when he reaches power, he’ll go and get the trophy wife.
A middle age crisis = a man who is supposed to be a king but is acting like a boy.
The heart of the king is undeveloped when as a boy, he is never entrusted with power. His heart is wounded often by other kinds when he was a young man in need of a good king to shepherd him but he got a bad king and there was a wounding and a betrayal. Out of that wounding, he is reluctant to ever lead. It is also wounded when he is never called out and up to his potential by older men who say, “We see this leader in you and we want you to take this on.”
As a king, you need an unbroken dependence on God realizing there are unfathered places in you where you’re not as strong as you need to be. Moses, David and Jesus all inquired of God before they moved. There was a humility to be guided and shepherded and fathered by God in their role as leaders.
When you’re around a bad king, you see the selfishness and the falsehood and it makes you say, “I don’t want any of it”.
As a young man, God wants to build your character before you set off to build a kingdom. If you take on too much, too young you will stumble and it can make you say, “I don’t have what it takes” and we want to avoid that. The desire for wealth and significance and validation = a young king looking in wrong places.
The biggest battle we have as kings is integrity. Our character will always be tested. Those that are under you and around you are looking to you saying, “right here, in this moment, I need you to live well”. They are saying (pleading), “Be a good king. We need you”. Others will depend on you. Come through. Live UP to all that you’ve come to be. Humility and patience will be needed along with integrity and character.
As you go through all these stages and hit your 40’s and 50’s and you start to make a little money, the temptation is “Hey, it’s my time, I want to enjoy myself” and that will be right at the precise moment when so many other people will need you to come through for them. At the time we’re wanting to make it about us, it’ll be all about others. It is … excurvatus ex se.
The battle is selflessness and not making it about me but rather in serving others.
The truth is, all of us want to be king. We all dream about money and success and power and prestige. We all dream of getting to that place where we will be served. But the truth is … a good king isn’t about being served. He’s all about serving others.